Detached
By Todd Bauer
An empty school hallway is lit up with high school students. One by the name of Aaron, a short sophomore wearing a blue button down shirt with classic faded jeans walks out of a class room by himself looking at the other students, hiding his depression. He walks to his locker that has no pictures, just books and a heavy fall jacket in case it gets too cold. He always made sure he was ready for a cold day in Colorado.
As he walked out he watched the girl he had asked on a date two months ago, Katie, who was about five five with shoulder length dark hair. She had said yes to the date, but Aaron’s truck broke down that night and she had thought he had blown her off. He tried to explain but she didn’t believe him even though she liked him just as much as he liked her.
His only two friends, Kyle and Brandon, surrounded his locker. These guys hung out with Aaron at school but never hung out after school. Aaron didn’t like playing sports but had the need to talk to people. Being unusually short, he felt like he never fit in, and from school he would always drive his 1987 Chevy pick-up home to an empty house.
His mother died two years ago while driving down an icy mountain in a blizzard and hit an oncoming semi. He was in the 8th grade when it happened and his dad drove to the scene right away. His mother was trapped inside of her mini-van barely conscious. The EMTs were waiting for the Jaws of Life to get her out. His dad was talking to an EMT and Aaron was at the car crying while his mom just stared into his eyes as an EMT had his hand on Aaron’s shoulder. His mother died before his father returned to the minivan.
Aaron had never been the same after this; his dad was a truck driver who wasn’t home much and Aaron never had anyone he could really talk about the accident with so he kept it inside of him and when he was sad he would think of his last moments with his mother and it made him sink deeper into a hidden depression.
Brandon had asked Aaron what he was doing that weekend. Aaron had been planning this afternoon for a month. He had explained that his father and him were having pizza tonight and going to a movie. It was a lie his father wouldn’t be home till about ten o’clock that night and Aaron knew no one would really notice him going into the Colorado Mountains.
He had felt really distant from everyone in his life and had no one to talk to he really desired a girlfriend to talk to. But he felt he had lost his chance with Katie and didn’t think she wanted to talk to him.
He walked into the school parking lot, watching couples walk out together and get in a single cab truck. The girl would sit in the middle seat and be snuggled up to her boyfriend. Aaron really wanted this but knew no one would like him like that since no one ever talks to him.
It was a 70-degree day probably the last one of the year. The trees were of that autumn color they should be in October. He opened the door to his truck as it squeaked open after never having put any oil on it. He drove home as if it was another day in the life of Aaron. He turned the key to his truck and the engine roared as it had always done. His pocket vibrated and he got a text from his father saying he wouldn’t be home till midnight. He wasn’t too close to his father, but he was trying to make an effort after his mother died. He put his phone back in his pocket and took the hunting knife out of the glove box that his mother and father gave him for deer hunting for this 15th birthday thinking, he would get into the sport. He never did, and had never used that knife. It was in a leather sleeve with a button over the handle so it would stay in. He unsnapped it and tested the sharpness on his arm hair; he cut part of his arm and knew it was sharp enough.
He started driving up to the make out point where he always wanted to take Katie and see if anything would happen. This point was above the town in the mountains, you could see the all the lights of the town from up here at night.
The shifter clicked into park when he arrived and parked the truck pointing toward the town that didn’t understand his problems. He got out looked at the town then looked down at the ground for a brief second and saw a frog eat a fly. He thought of the easy life the frog had only, had to sleep and catch flies. He tightened his hiking boots up, strapped his knife to his belt, turned away from the town, and started walking up the mountain.
He could never foresee the future, which had played a big part in his life. But had seen this day for about a month, planning on his father not being home till late. He was walking on a deer path and scared out two doe’s he had saw. He had taken this walk before and was looking for a stump that was about five hundred yards away.
He thought he would not be missed; his only real friends were on his Xbox and had no idea where they could possibly live. Brandon and Kyle never asked to do anything outside of school and knew they would be mildly affected with his choice.
He came to the stump, and brushed off the leaves and most of the rotten wood around it. Turned around and sat down he could feel how dirty this stump was on his ass. He took out his knife and set it next to him starring at it as if it was a portal to a new world where things might change. He bowed his head and said a prayer hoping God would forgive his choice.
He picked up the cold knife and pulled up his black long sleeve shirt. The air was much colder up here than it was in the valley. He brushed the blade over his arm hair to test the sharpness, the hair was stuck to the blade. He lifted his shirt up and wiped the blade on his shirt underneath his sweatshirt.
He held his arm out and brought the blade to his wrist; put it on the skin and pulled firmly towards himself. His eyes started watering right away, and a longing yell was held out. His crying reminded himself of a small child who cries for no reason; he didn’t think his death would be this painful. He lay back on the large stump and tried not to look at his bleeding wrist. He thought of how nice it would be to see his mother again and to be out of this painful world where no one paid attention to him.
Fifteen minutes had passed and he grew light headed. He could not understand why he was not dead yet. He twitched as his cell phone went off, and used his right hand which wasn’t damaged to see who would care to talk to him in the last minutes of his life. He was amazed as if it was a sign from God, the blue back light on the phone read Katie. His heart started pumping harder and the blood started flowing out faster he brought the phone up to his ear and tried not to sound distressed.
He struggled to get the first word out but then said, “Hi!” “Hi, Aaron I was wondering if you aren’t doing anything tonight if you wanna come over and watch a movie, and maybe make some popcorn?” Katie asked. “Yeah, sure that sounds fun.” Aaron replied, whom was really struggling to hang on to this phone. “Well how about you come over at 9” She said. Aaron said sure and hung up the phone.
Things seemed to make sense, his dad used to take him out hunting when he was younger and had taught him how to take care of a wound. He took his sweatshirt off and one sock; he tied the sock on his super arm to stop blood from flowing as fast and wrapped his sweatshirt firmly around his wrist. He stood up and stumbled to the nearest Pine tree. He thought he would be able to make it too his truck. He took three very deep breaths and started walking the 500 yards back to his truck.
Walking at a very quick pace he tripped over a root that was sticking out of the ground like a stem on an apple. He fell quickly to the ground like a tree being cut down he started crying for help. Three minutes had passed and he had decided to do the only thing that could save him. He dialed 911 and explained to them where he was and that he was unable to move and cut himself about 20 minutes ago. They said the could have an ambulance there in less then 20 minutes, he knew he didn’t have that much time. He told them they needed to be here in five and closed the phone. He started to get chills and couldn’t help closing his eyes. He made himself open them every now and then to see if an ambulance was there.
He started to hear a buzzing noise in the distance his fear was the bees, which he was very allergic too. He started to think maybe he was really supposed to die. He closed his eyes tight so they wouldn’t get in his eyes. He thought he was hallucinating because the bees were so loud. Then he felt a man’s hands on his head, and him say open your eyes if you are still conscious. He opened his eyes and saw three paramedics loading him onto a stretcher with a device connected to the helicopter hovering above. His hair was being pulled back like a news anchor in a hurricane.
The paramedics tapped on the stretcher and gave the thumbs up to the helicopter. His twitching heightened as the basket he was in, was swinging like a pendulum. He could hear the people in the helicopter screaming something but the sound of their voice and the movement of their mouths were working like an old Jackie Chan movie not matching up well. He was very confused and figured he would never grace the ground again after being picked up.
A red glove reached out and grabbed the basket pulling Aaron into the helicopter. He had asked what was wrong but Aaron could not respond even though he was trying. The red-gloved man took his sweatshirt off from his wrist and opened a bang, which looked like sand was in it and poured it over the cut. He had said, “Things will be fine this will stop the bleeding.” He could not help but to close his eyes.
He awoke just in time to have five people with masks all around him it was very crowded. A skinny man with a rather large mustache came running into the room with a red bag of blood and handed it to the doctor in the blue scrubs. He unhooked the IV and put in the blood. He had started to feel better after an hour had gone by. The blue scrub-wearing doctor walked out of the room for a second and had brought back in Aaron’s dad. He had a stern face but was completely red and wet from tears, he had hugged Aaron and told him to never pull anything like that again.
He had skipped the next Monday of class too ashamed of being seen in public after his stunt, which was reported on the 11 o’clock news that same night. He called Katie that night and told her he would still like to hang out if it were possible. He would never tell anyone that, her phone call is what saved his life, figured it might sound creepy. She agreed for a movie date on Friday. He would have never thought it would have worked out that way.
He came into class on Tuesday when he walked into school it was nothing like he would have thought. He imagined people starring at him as if he was some freak of nature, but instead he felt embraced by almost everyone he talked to that day.
He got in his old truck and drove out to the site where he thought he would have ended his chapter. He had the knife in hand and carved through the blood in that old rotten stump, “Aaron Patton, 11/8/91 –.” He took the knife and stabbed it in the stump and walked away leaving the bloody knife in the only thing that was dead.
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